It's all me, me, me...

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Vivre Sa Vie
London, United Kingdom
Well hello there. My name is Viv (well, it's not really), and, like a lot of people, I'm ever so slightly neurotic... I have panic attacks and anxiety (ranging from mild to pretty intense), on and off. I also have an amazing and quite high-profile job, so I'm choosing to remain anonymous on here. Not because I'm ashamed of the aforementioned neuroses, but because I don't want to be googled and for my colleagues to read bizarre posts about me breathing into a paper bag and popping lorazepam. I've worked for bookshops, mixed arts festivals and charities, and have met (and still meet!) a lot of famous, fetching and fantabulous people for my job. (See, anxiety doesn't need to stop you being AWESOME and doing what you want to do) Here's hoping you'll find some helpful hints and tips on here which will help you tackle the evil panic heebiejeebs... PS. I'm an Australian, but I live in the UK, and have adopted tea-drinking, pubs, Wodehouse, and a Welsh man.
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Wednesday, 29 August 2012

Brain - serotonin = WET CHAOS...

Just like this poor woman, my brain has fallen victim to moving and sentimental images, like fully-clothed sunbathing on LiLos, and Italian wedding dresses. 

My brain and I have had a falling out. There's been a slapped wrist (brains have wrists) and an official warning over negligence of basic duties. It's not being fed serotonin every morning with its cornflakes and has gone all mushy and sentimental and weird.

In the last two days I have cried in the following ways:
  • When I flicked over to the X-Factor (eating dinner, urgently needed moving images) and listened to a mildly talented boy whose parents had split up (they couldn't even scrape together any real tragedy for the pre-singing story) sing a probably mediocre song, but in my addled state I just heard music, so was moved. I mean, multiple tears, not just A single, individual tear.
  • Watching some terrible documentary about athletes and how-hard-they-trained-for-the-Olympics-and-how-happy-they-were-that-all-their-hard-work-had-paid-off-and-how-it-was-all-worth-it-and-how-they-were-really-pleased-to-represent-the-country-and-how-grateful-they-were-to-their-coaches-who-had-been-through-it-with-them-from-the-very-beginning-and-most-of-all-to-their-families-who-always-believed-in-them cue Coldplay.
  • Watching the last 3 minutes (literally) of Masterchef Australia where the winner was crowned. I want to clarify that I had not watched ANY of the series, so this was a record tear release from a standing start.
  • When someone's pastry tore on the Great British Bake-off.
  • At several slow-motion sporting montages calculatedly created to cause maximum heartstring damage by the BBC

But here's the clincher:
  • I CRIED WATCHING AN 80s RE-RUN OF THE CRYSTAL MAZE. When a girl managed to get a crystal. That's all. When she took it back to the team they all cheered and I felt my eyes moisten.

And I said -  'ENOUGH!!!! The Crystal Maze??? Really, has it come to this? You are genuinely moved by a 20 year old re-run on Challenger? What is happening up there in the control room Mr Brain? Are you pulling the wrong levers or something? Are you drunk? Are you asleep at the wheel? Do you need a defibrillator? What do you want from me?!'

How long does it take brains to get back to normal after a number of years being chemically enhanced, I wonder...


Oh no, don't, I can feel them forming. Look at her eager face. Oh God, it's too late. What a moving display of ingenuity and problem-solving. Pass the tissues please.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think relish the tears! My irish mammy always thinks a good cry is the best thing for you.
P.s -I ALWAYS cry at sport to music and I once cried at a Werthers Original advert. The Granddad was just so nice.
xx

Rosie said...

also HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH..you cried at the Crystal Maze!!

Sheryn Wilson said...

I am from New Zealand and have just found your blogs..LOVE them..

Pompom said...

My crying is a huge source of amusement for my boyfriend. I think he's a bit of a heartless freak, though. He didn't understand why I cried at the end of ET. When little Henry Thomas didn't go with ET on the spaceship and when little Drew Barrymore said goodbye to him....total weep-fest, don't you think? The Crystal Maze does sound a step too far, though. Still, if it's because you empathise with someone acheiving something (however unimportant it may seem), then that's a Good Thing. So, you're wearing your empathy on your sleeve at the moment...it's better to have it than not at all. ;-)

Vivre Sa Vie said...

Hey A - your mum sounds awesome, and so do you (anyone who cries at everything must be a nice person, right?!). Wow, a Werthers original advert - we should do a cry off or something to see who can moisten first at a margarine ad! V x

Vivre Sa Vie said...

Rosie - my boyfriend literally said the exact same thing. 'BAHAHAHAHA - is that a tear?!! At the Crystal Maze?! This is a new record!' I suppose the real question is why an adult with a job was watching Crystal Maze re-runs, but we won't even go there...

Vivre Sa Vie said...

Hi Sheryn - welcome! So happy to have another Antipodean on board! I'm Australian but have been living in the UK for almost ten years now (for my sins). Looking forward to chatting with you on here! V x

Vivre Sa Vie said...

Hey PomPom - I am so happy you found this blog (and me), because you just know how to say all the right things to a girl! I completely agree with you about ET - your boyfriend must have been having a weird empathy short-circuit. You all have to watch Crying Wife though - she IS us is a nutshell. Although maybe more so... http://cryingwife.com/_/videos.html

Pompom said...

Oh thank you, V! The Crying Wife is WONDERFUL. I think her husband is like many men...just baffled that we internalise so much more of the stories than they do. To be fair, my BF does have his emotional movie moments...like during Top Gun or The Gladiator...or at least he claims to as I haven't witnessed anything yet! And the other day he was at his Sainbury's (we live apart) and he witnessed some other customers getting a traumatic phone call...and his immediate thought was that he wanted to hear my voice, so he rang me. Sweet. Though he does still roll his eyes when I cry at silly stuff.

Keep up your great blogging!

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